Does Anyone Have A Leaf Vacuum

# 4: The ugly, racist these

I drank another sip of brandy to forget that I was talking to a real deity. God, she was beautiful. She moved her hair greasy and badly discolored around her finger coiled, with the air of a model of supreme beauty. She was chewing his gum loudly, which only added more charm to his lips covered with gloss. Each stroke of jaw caused a small rebound on his cheeks, freckles and wriggled in joy.

Whenever she spoke, her plump neck is moved to the rhythm of his words, flying in a voluptuous dance to the sound of his words. Whenever she finished a sentence, his eyebrows rose abruptly from the wrath of his bold buttons.

was sure, to quote a French philosopher: Tonight, I would conclude. It was long I had not had the opportunity to have any intercourse, and tonight, this supreme beauty was offered to me, and I saw myself scratching his back soft and breathable. My furry little body and her big hairy body, both united in a position that would allow me not to smother the smell of sweat ... Ah, the excitement rising in me, while I admired his yellow teeth and decayed ...

You, you, the kind who loves ugly?
This text seems quite correct, and nothing shocks you when you go from "I was talking to a real god" to "yellow teeth and decayed?
Are you single?
You're ugly?
Then your happiness is on the Internet recently: the first dating site for ugly. After all, as its author says, half of the English is ugly (sic). Why deprive ourselves to meet the ugly?
I actually heard a dating site zoophilia red and HIV would be established soon.

Heal the cat hides to be forgotten, lest
be registered on the site of zoophiles red positive.

I must say that I am very surprised by this kind of ideas that can sometimes sprout in the brains of some people mistakenly stopped. Would they have been abused during childhood by people physically pleasant? Anyway, I have my say on that.

start slowly: it is indeed discrimination. Because yes, if you're beautiful and you like ugly, you can go well you pack the lily from your local wildlife to meet via the web, as your registration will be denied. Just because you're beautiful, you can not find love among the ugly. That's all, it's like that, so you'll hit the guns and let them ugly. They do not have requested, the unfortunate!
So you, young ladies, who spend 50% of your free time to belittle you, go and register on this site, and when you have been refused, you can finally stop shouting to the world that you're ugly, knowing that c is false, all the males around you trying desperately to deflower you.

Bouuuh! A beautiful death! All camps!
cleaned karsh! Bouuuuh!

Moreover, this logic works both ways: the ugly are people with tastes like all the others. This is not because we love what is ugly is ugly. Certainly, the ugly are well placed to know that this is not the physical that is the soul, but I do not think they provided before fiddling with pictures of obese women and hairy, though? If, when you're ugly, we love the ugly. When you're ugly, you have a lousy car, a house ugly, ugly woman, ugly children, and you look in his Secret Story ugly sofa.

Moreover, who can really define something as subjective as beauty? If you're ugly, but that the webmaster is just reached, and that you find beautiful, you will remain single. He decides. You're ugly, everyone tells you, but if the administrator has said that you were beautiful, you'll end up old boy with your right hand or old daughter with your right middle finger for one partner. You had to be ugly as its criteria.

Some might think that the physics of the website, it would be better thought principle. It missed. Indeed, the site itself is as ugly as its members. Proper color kitsch, shapes disgusting, everything is there to say "you're on a site created by ugly ugly for ugly, welcome if you're ugly." We return to this idea that seems be very important to the founder's ugly does not deserve a beautiful site, they deserve an ugly site. Because the ugly as beautiful seems when you're ugly, remember?

With this, there is the paradox between what the creator says the site and what we watch. I quote the character in question: "But do not you tired of all these dating sites corny-la-praline that show beautiful love walking hand in hand on a windswept beach? ". There, you naturally translate it into "Enough 's enough to see that beautiful, we want to see ugly" .

The problem? Why is there there a commercial with a pair exactly like he just criticize? Is it just stupid? It should create a dating site for idiots. That would work better: everyone knows that idiots come out with stupid.

Look, for example, the book became a cult in the world-nian nian that appeals to idiots: Edward, vampire idiot incidentally (not worth developing, though?) Comes out with Bella to remain human idiot ( no need here either). That is, an idiot and a fool out together. I also have many examples like this in my life, but I would like to avoid the crowds let loose, I also remain silent on their names.

The site in question with an advertisement showing a photograph
who proudly serves as a reminder to right they are ugly ugly.

So here's my proposal, which is what it's worth: keep quiet ugly, yet they can not be desperate, admit that it is possible that they are not as ugly as that, Vanessa and fantasize about the girl in super mini skirt joined the club Reading High School who has watched once under way, and asked them a gum. She wants to marry Robert Pattinson, but when you believe same. Certainly, they'll like me, sitting at table in front of a Picasso alive, recounting her life allowing her only to define the word uninteresting. But this is not a reason not to leave them alone. Returning

elsewhere, as it is spoken, on the shelf which I had escaped some time to talk about this latest invention of Web 2.0. She just asked me, nonchalantly, the mini-heart in mouth stinking badly drawn:
" - You just have a coffee fez me?
- Oh no! You, you stay here, I gotta go.
- gooo, f'il you like!
- No, no, I insist. Come on, I'm nice, I leave you an address if you feel the need to see me.
- Okay, wait, ve come out a paper and ftylo. "

She handed me his pen and chewed a greasy paper, which I wrote somehow the coordinates of which she seemed so desperately need. When I gave him everything she read and looked at me blankly, his one eyebrow drawn up, his eyes glassy with tears.
"- what F'est fa?
- The only address you need to know to be happy. "

I gave him the address, hoping it had internet at home, as this paper he stated the following coordinates: http://www.theuglybugball.co.uk/ .

And there, in every good player you are, you wonder what is the most exciting conclusion of this story. Here it is: when you're a bastard, we love to beautiful girls ugly rakes.

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Bradcot Awning Frame Diagram

# 3: TV .. . Too!

My dog is stupid today. For some reason, it keeps picking up that piece of plastic-covered buttons, and the rest on my knees. However, I told you so "I do not watch TV, the dog." Nothing so, it continues to stir stupidly tail while offering me the damn remote without delicacy, offering control over the television was invented to help stupefy the idiots and make them more skeptical misanthropes. I turn then nonchalantly position without realizing that I open a door interdimensional directly overlooking the underworld.

I do not know what you think of television, but I personally see as an evil invention. At first, naive, one sees only advantages: information, entertainment, all close at hand ... No, not so much the machine error that individuals who hide behind. Posting it on their faces a Machiavellian grin before leaving us bec so coldly, machinists anti-intelligence pushed the buttons that adorn their consoles to send us in the eyes of what lead to the development of a brain tumor in a newborn.

phrases most idiotic and surreal world are linked together without understanding in dialogues that inspire insipid as the killing of those who utter them, their impresarios, their writers, their hamsters and anything that could transmit HIV from near and far, interspersed advertisements.

Panzani ridiculous and advertising are the perfect example of what makes television the plight of all humans who still have eyes and a half functional brain. Fortunately, it is limited to television. Imagine if when you read a book as wonderful as "Twilight," "Little Brown Bear" or "Harry Potter", between each chapter, the narrator offered you a page of advertising?

"The house of our charming family stereotyped alleged but poorly dubbed French and more like a Swede from a career in the hexagon, has walls flash red and yellow neon. The furniture is all colors, giving us all the brightness of a room whose purpose is to silence the schizophrenic blinding them to limit their hallucinations. The kitchen is equipped, tidy, you feel like a hospital for the blind, one is happy. Through the window we see a beautiful landscaped garden, as our dear Mr. gardening seriously, to keep all her little household.

A charming housewife-masked to less than 50 years on anti-depressants (since she realized that leaving his house to be painted by an army of myopathic color blindness was not a good idea), no husband (one working while she's cleaning, proof of modernism in this charming French family) raising two lovely grandchildren and well groomed blond, smiling, eating properly, clothed respectively the t-shirt with stripes all the charming little guys are cute little dress and pink all the girls are between the ages of the same age, sings while preparing pasta Shelley PANZANI that cook very quickly if you put the Love in the recipe, and you talk about childhood, youth and recklessness.

It displays a smile not hiding not the magic of her medications she now uses in massive doses, and also allowing us to see his dentist pulls no punches on scaling, and adds:''

PANZANI ... TOO!''

The children, delighted to eat a dish as luxurious, their little lips already covered with foam, their language and their stomachs bloated starvation shouting accompanying their dear mother in this song tribal tribute to pulp. It is apparently customary among these strange people to sing when you eat pasta, so the thing out of the ordinary. Do not we say that the Italian is a language of the singing? Proof: singing in front of pasta. Resuming all together:''

PANZANI ... TOO!'''

Even Barbie is it too pink ...

What joy it is for us readers to have to endure such nonsense. The publishers are not yet affected by psychological illness suggesting that basic human if advertising works on weak minds on television, it is equally effective in magazines, DVDs, cinemas film, video games, websites, newspapers, walls, rear bumpers ... Soon we will stick patches on the front to buy an apple at -10%, and we will be sure that if people buy apples is because of this wonderful stroke of genius.

When I want to see is to see a hideous eye on a restless funk. Secret Story. Yes, Secret Story, reality television, the evil person, pain, death, the ultimate insult. But why am I the devil on TF1!?

Warning: Cyclops wicked

To have had the morbid curiosity to take a look - haha - at Secret Story, I must confess that it would have been difficult to believe that this was so pitiful that I had been supposed. I wanted to find observing young horny surrounded pouffettes heat in a loft alternating every color imaginable kitsch might have any interest. But this was not the case.

Before me, stories of heart and a childish and pathetic behavior remind me while reality TV is made by people idiots, idiots, idiots with it. A love triangle of human stupidity, stupid or morons eat under the amused gaze of fools.

Consider an example: the intersection of metalhead / goth faux-called "vampire". Everyone knows that vampires are involved in issues of reality TV. Incidentally, I'm waiting to see what type of false-rebel chick die slowly crazy from not being able to feed on blood before the cameras.

Maybe we could get him a goat or a pig? No? He is a vegetarian, perhaps? I think has no choice in the world of the undead, in theory: they drink the blood if we peg out. In addition, I saw him eat anything else. Since when do vampires can feed on human food? No, but because in this case it would long as they live among us by eating hamburgers like any good capitalist.

fashion of "I'm a vampire," probably the most ridiculous methods for false-marginal-in-lack-of-personality-who-is-their-own. Who will honestly believe that this hair came out of his coffin to go participate in Secret Story?

was also a hermaphrodite born emo super class. When you are naturally born with both sexes, you are sure to dress in emo well say that like all others, you're bi. No, you do not necessarily own personality, you stay emo, but born with both sexes. With a graphical interface and behavior of such little frustrated ill at ease, everyone makes fun of him / her, poor little (e). However, he adopted a technique of defense of the most personal: "I sulk in my bed in pink neon yellow bathrobe. Why not.

The secret should be "I was resambl
ts ley kikou aje 2 min lol" ...

I will not even football broadcast on all strings that night dangerously in the evenings for those who do not care. The screen goes black, do not abuse the poor things.

I throw the remote into the TV, the beast breaks out on the ground, tramples hard. Ah! But if I suddenly realize that there was a utility to this machine that I unfortunately just completed under the weight of my boots. With what shall I take my DVDs and other media more or less legal now?
Oh no, it's good, I have a computer.

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How To Drink Captain Morgan

# 2: Inception, its noise, its operating

I was quiet this morning. I looked casually young Japanese schoolgirls breasts too large to reveal their virgin body hair, before working with a mustachioed plumber, helped by a goat and a mutant octopus out of hell to destroy virginity. Not the thing, the very concept of virginity. Life was peaceful on the whole.

However, it was otherwise. My phone was agitated, releasing an air of metal containing music from a Tim Burton film, reminding me how I should change ringing nimbly. I resolved to turn off my screen, and win. At the end of the line, Temptation, which seemed not recovered from our last night "Alcohol and GHB" I whispered weakly that there was a huge must-see film, and if I ratais, I'm the spoiler end that I would suffer martyrdom, until dying in my vomit in December 2012, but before the end of the world, because there should not messing around either.

This film, as you all know, he did his little hype, we sing the praise, he was hoisted above all the masterpieces of cinematic pretext that the end ... Do not start by the end. Anyway, I say I will not start at the end, only I'll spoiler, and in addition you have already seen, because everyone saw it. Yes, even the blind, deaf, dumb, maimed, dead-seropositive and bowls of Antarctica saw. It underestimates the ratings that are too minority of Antarctica.

Where was I before you interrupt me? Ah yes. So I had to see this "famous movie". So I grabbed my leather jacket studded bad days, before going to land some old and others kékés or emos, to significantly reduce my waiting time, and for good Because it was still fun. I could therefore have in hand what maaaaagnifique ticket, which made me spend so much money unnecessarily, weeping and advance this frivolous expenditure (come on, do not add any, I was expecting a nice film, I naive can be) and proudly displaying INCEPTION, ROOM 1.

A cross between The Day After Tomorrow and Batman: The Dark Knight?

Yes, Inception is a room, that's when the film is that everyone is talking about, it was the best room.

End pubs, movie starts. Di Caprio, straight out of Titanic, stranded Finally, on a beach. He drifted long. Unfortunately for the poor man, no beautiful girl topless for sustenance, only Asian soldiers who jabber phrases in their native dialect, incomprehensible. What

go crazy, what an idea at last! We start the film on an unknown language. Then I tore my ticket in frustration, and realized that the passage Di Caprio liked being tempered in his films.

violent transition, and we here at the end of the film. The router touuuurne, touuuuurne and then shaky, then perhaps have to, then perhaps have not oulala that choose (note that router is a feminine term, and takes 10 hours to make a choice, finish with it what you want), oulala. Waited too long, the generic launches without asking anyone, thus interrupting the suspense that was sweating all the men of the room squealing and all women.

2:30 to finish on the''maybe.'' That's really damn cool! Want buzzer make fuss children? Simple: just create a movie with: guns, guys who refuse to see the psychiatrist so that the mission depends on their mental health, special effects, parallel realities, and a final cut too early to know whether the movie ends well or not. Or rather, not knowing if the film is finished.

I give you a live example: Ashk burglar is in virtual 2089. It penetrates the virtual architectures, which are completely artificial worlds, and to pump information such as a small hack. Yes, that's how we pirate in the future, what do you want. The best thing is that Ashk be embodied by a pure star, say ... Nicolas Cage would like. You should know that architecture is really a virtual world created by the wish of the man who invented it.

One day, he is given a mission: he must share two pieces of information, while making a copy to hand his employer. However, two pieces of information exchange is impossible. Impossible? No. He has already done. But on a smaller scale. The value of an exchange? Allow the collapse of two architectures at once. Because yes, when inserting false information, architecture collapses. The pay is simply the loss incurred in the prosecution against him, which he will finally return home, find her sister with cancer. The guy not even knowing if it is still alive.

He decided to create an architecture that will be linked to both architecture and loot the two information before re- place. Once he has had in hand, he will of course have made a copy of self-plundering.

Then he leaves his home to gather a team to build the architecture, but he gets shot! Fortunately, after dodging bullets and 26,000 accrued on the walls, he can return safely.

But then, we learn that in fact every time he built an architecture, it is taken from an irrepressible need to complicate it up, so you may get lost, to secure it. Of course, everyone would balance is not that bad.

mission begins, he enters the first architecture, but people are waiting. They are there to protect the architecture. ProtectBots call them. Who cares, he and his team breaches the cladding of virtual weapons, fight, and at the same time, find the place where hidden information. But a copy must remain there for the right time.

the others are sent from this architecture to another, and vanishing in this architecture. When you change your architecture, it was a virtual who stays there. To add to the danger.

Same thing, fighting, and all the special effects imaginable.

From there, you go into the architecture of our hero. Ashk is mentally deficient, however, and its architecture is a very complicated maze, populated by a lot of ProtectBots. Moreover, he found there alone. Via some unresolved and some turning situations (appearance of his sister that the guide, why not), we finally found the place for receipt of copies.

It receives synchronous, they plundered.

Then you wake up in an architecture using a keyword that is "reality, there leaves the information, and allowed to explode all the architecture changing architecture. The same is done in the next. Each time, the architecture in question explodes and the alarm must be all that is more energetic, not to die. Because if you die, you are stuck in a virtual nothingness.

last scene, our Ashk enters the hospital, and does not find his sister. He learns that his beloved sister is healed! What a miracle! What joy! He can not go and enjoy, and change pants. This hacker is therefore included in his power, bursts through the door without wanting to, so there is more, then took a doubt, looking at his sister, and especially his employer who is there, and welcome.

Before this stress, he says "reality", close your eyes, open them again, and ... Generic.

Was it in reality? We do not know! Hahaha! What a great movie! Just add enough to disturb the audience ratings with a lot of double-meaning phrases, and it is there.

Now that I'm letting off steam, at least acknowledge qu'Inception is not the first film to leave us in doubt, far from it. Take the example of Existenz: The last sentence is "we're still in the game? . In Vanilla Sky, it "opens eyes". No, this gentleman is really a genius, because it sends in dreams realistic as possible.

Ah yes, here's another interesting thing : Realistic dreams. I do not mind, it is easier to manage. However, I think I heard the beginning to the end of the movie you would not understand the alarm before it was illogical elements. So why do they head? Why is it sets too boring? Finally, it is a choice, accept.

Dream or reality? Trollons!

For those who ask the question: the router does not stop. But it does not continue. What? What am I doing? Of quantum physics? No, no, calm down, clumsy and impressionable minds. I just tells you that the goal is to make you speak, so there is no response.

However, if one looks, one can observe that the router fails and slows instead of remaining straight as usual, that children are not the same actors (in the credits, it says), and alliance that appears in the dreams is not on hand for Di Caprio. Make it what you want.

My conclusion is that this film is an Avatar 2: noisy, not so much as that. Ok, it's pretty, it makes you think, but then to classify it (as some have reported to me that this had been done) 3rd Film history of cinema, I find it completely unfair. Beside Inception, there are a number of films that are worth much more instantly. It is classified as a marvel of film just because of the noise created by his non-finish. In the end, without the Internet, this film would not have been so successful, because there would not have all these debates readable by all, that grow in maximum fuss. And I myself come to make my contribution to this mess media, so I'll shut up without stressing the inconsistencies and other things in making a film that allows itself to look, and nothing more.

I rekindled so, before you greet my screen on which Japanese women did not wait for me to invite a carnivorous plant to their small-school celebration.

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Diagram On Body Temperature

# 1: sprawling

The blog starts again, but comics exit, or at least for now. Instead of introducing myself as a good blogger, I preferred to speak in the following way: a long example is better than a long presentation. So I pulled out of a cardboard covered with dust my first article, which was speaking during the World Cup, an animal far from being the most common: Paul Octopus.

---

original date: July 15, 2010

Today, at a time when approaching the end of the world, where unemployment is rising, where poverty is palpable, today, my brothers, let us rejoice, because the octopus Paul Boche gave birth to a i-Phone application.

The new representative of the human intellect,
heroes of the world, savior of mankind.

Dear humans, you'll never ceases to amaze me. Sometimes, really, I thought we touched the bottom, but now, going kindly check my mail, it took me very little to discover how you could fall much lower in the media buffoonery. Because yes, you who read me, decerebrate footballer, who honestly beat your wife home from work, before enjoying the true meaning of life, a beer in his hand in front of Canal + Sport and the other in your underpants, you don Ace of ceases to amaze me. Today, I learn so that you and millions of other chimpanzees cleverly hidden in the mass of humanity a little time be intellectually developed, have been passionate and have watched regularly for forty-five minutes an octopus.

No, no, it's not an octopus like the others, since Paul (it is true that, for that matter, the dress up a ridiculous name was a great idea to make it more laughable) is an octopus that predicts the future. We put food in a box a dirty little brat (or innocent child for those who still dare to believe that a toddler could be more innocent than twenty seconds in his life) ten years has decorated his chubby little hands of a flag. On the other hand, another box proudly displays the other flag is seen also topped with a fruit of the sea And the beast is loose: Paul (admit it's scary).

However, as is well known public that the IQ of an octopus and a fanatical football are more or less similar, the octopus in a small box scores every few minutes of hesitation, and you, with joy that you admire lovingly eating cephalopod a die, because after all, nature is so beautiful that if one adds a touch football, it can only be incredibly interesting. A bit like running your lawn on which hero is more beautiful than the Amazon rainforest, where you can not find his ball. Paul has chosen what he would eat, and you conclude that he chose who would win. And as there are only 50% chance he did because, if telling the truth is that he is seeing. What is expected to become a messiah?

Since this poor animal has committed the great mistake to move towards the mussel English, while Maite has quit repeating it less likely dégobiller all night by swallowing a mold from the Netherlands low, it is impossible to watch the news without discovering the joy that Paul octopus new hero known worldwide, has actually unlikely to live until 2012 or even that disappointed since it was bought by Apple.

Well, humanity's intellect over-developed, let me say two things.

First, it is ultimately not surprising that the foul heap of shapeless slug that you made an octopus is passionate, and above all it refers to a decision.

importantly, thanks to you, I discovered a passion for the shapeless masses with tentacles that allows me to finally understand why Bill Kaulitz, German castrato of the group that would like a room in Japan, and his brother were so successful .

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